Wednesday, April 22, 2015

Joe Marrese


Joe makes me laugh until I cry in the first minute. The Jim Gaffigan of our generation. So funny throughout and odd. Good buddy of mine. 


Check out this episode!

Monday, April 13, 2015

Thursday, April 9, 2015

Wednesday, April 8, 2015

Jay Light


This episode has a story. However, it doesn't involve Jay and I. Well, not really. There are bleeps protecting someone's first name, it's obvious it is one of Jay's exes. We say it in the show. Only the first name was ever said. They are not in the comedy community.  The things said in my opinion were not harmful or defamous to anyone, except maybe me. I always look the worst and that's usually what makes the show work. And again I looked bad.

 

You'll hear me describe the girl in pretty glowing terms from how I describe people. It was my fault it didn't work out with her, I sold out a lot to even be with her that night. I compromised.

 

After the original episode came out, unedited, 79 people heard it. I released the episode at 10pm, at 12 am I was told to take it down by the girl. She cited lawyers she had contacted and a case from Minnesota that said even if you use nicknames it could be defamation. She said she had listened to 55 minutes, but couldn't listen to any more. So she contacted lawyers around 11pm. Whether or not she did, who knows. 

 

I read the email at my desk the next morning. I had an anxiety attack at work. If there's any dominate emotion in my life it's guilt and no matter what I'm accused of I tend to agree with it. But then I got angry after I knew I was in the right. We don't speak ill of her, Jay tells his side of the story and I tell mine. We simply say what happened. All that needed to be said by her was, "You hurt my feelings, please take my name out. I don't want to be associated with this." But to claim that Jay and I are lying or intentionally seeking to hurt someone's reputation is ridiculous. Especially, Jay. Me, I totally get that, but in this instance, not the case.

 

The point is, I was scared. Bluffing works.  I've made people angry before, of course that is going to happen when you are asking people to defend their life. Not so much of the lawyers or a lawsuit. I have nothing she could take, not even happiness. I wasn't afraid of her as much as I was my dad figuring out I had a podcast. I fear his judgment, he and my mom have never seen me doing comedy, and after telling them a joke on thanksgiving, I don't think they ever will. Worse, my dad's a lawyer. I made the call to tell him. He said take it down immediately, it's not worth the risk. He was far more supportive than I was expecting. I loved him for not wanting to hear a second of the podcast. 

 

And I think that's what it ultimately came down to for me. I didn't want to be in a fight with my dad over what to do. That and friends and I have said things that are illegal in a confessional way trying to seek the other's help in a roundabout way. Mostly worried about me, again I don't need my dad seeing me in jail or prosecuted. The Dad or the Law, it's still hard to say who I'm more afraid of.

 

I think that's when it hit me. We all care about image, most importantly our image. How we are talked about, why we are talked about, how we were misconstrued constantly run through my mind all day. Most of my image depends on what my parents think about me and keeping them in the dark. I figure people would hate me even if I was a perfect human being, people would still hate me, so I don't worry too much about it, but it still hurts when a stranger hates you. It's crazy, but you still think, "Well, yeah, but if they knew me."

 

The girl cared about how she might be seen in a professional light. The chance that it could've affected her career is non-existent, however a great compliment to how successful she thought the podcast was. That's what happens though, when people say things about us, we want to change the story, change the narrative, even if what we are saying is a lie. I understand that impulse. I know why she did what she did. I don't like it, but it is a human response.

 

I care about image too. When people tell me you don't like the show or don't like my comedy, it hurts, it should. One of my friends told me, "That I was losing my last shreds of humanity by continuing to do the podcast."  And for a minute, I thought about why I do this. I do it for control. I'm unbearably honest because I don't want people to find out second hand about things I've done. I try to lay bear the mechanism. I don't mind looking bad, it will lessen the blow when I do something really awful. Everyone has a closet full of terrible things we've done, it's called privacy. And sometimes it's too real. It's too close to the heart, especially when feelings get in conflict with facts. 

 

And I knowingly put people through that. Not just people, but my friends. And it is not for them, it's for me. As it always is. Ultimately and honestly I care about myself more than anyone else. I hate that about me. I wish it was different, but I didn't come to Hollywood to make friends. I came to feel better about myself and be famous.

 

I'm sure all of the things on this podcast will come back tenfold to haunt me, but ultimately I think the show is great. You get to listen to two people try to figure out their friendship on air. It's just two people alone in a messy apartment maybe telling each other the truth for the first time in their relationship. And I love doing it.

 

You're going to listen to the episode and think, "Wait, what was that all about? There's nothing in there. What's in the missing four minutes?" I promise you, these are not the Nixon tapes. It's nothing, but that nothing hurt someone's feelings. I wish I had been contacted without the threat of a lawsuit, which ultimately they would have lost. Between us, Jay and I have spoken to about 8 lawyers. They all said, no case. 

 

Jay took a different approach than me. He was willing to go to court cause he said we didn't lie everything we said in it was truth. I don't think Jay has had a lot of fights in his life and needed this. I felt that too that deep need to fight, but I get it every week on the podcast A new Jay Light is forming, much different than the one I met 3 years ago at Flappers. Whether this is a good thing or not, time will tell. 

 

 

No lawsuit or podcast could ever make Jay Light a bad person. He's not and never will be. 


Check out this episode!

Wednesday, April 1, 2015

Monday, December 31, 2012

2012 Cage Year

It's been a long year for the Hollywood Defender and tonight represents the last blog of the year. We made it to 100 and thanks for all your support. If it hadn't been for Nic Cage I don't think I would have made it through this trying year. The man is an inspiration to all. So the final blog will represent a thank you note to everything I love about Nicolas Cage in 2012.


1. His hair
2. His memes
3. Ghost Rider 2
4. Stolen
5. His Big Daddy rumors in Kick Ass 2
6. His dedication to his craft
7. His vow to pay back the government
8. The Hungry Rabbit Jumps
9. His masquerade mask wearing self
10. The tease of Frozen Ground
11. The Croods Trailer
12. The promise of National Treasure 3
13. The future
14. The comeback

Thanks Nic and to all his fans, let's hope 2013 represents another great year in Cage. And of course, the only meme I created all year.


Thanks, 

THE HOLLYWOOD DEFENDER